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The Strawberry Letter: Please Get Off of Me

Dear Steve and Shirley,

I'm 38 years old, have a two-year-old, and a two-month-old. My husband and I have been married for two years, and we've been busy growing our family, albeit not intentionally. He has an 18-year-old son, and initially, he mentioned that having more children wasn't high on his list of priorities when we met. However, as soon as we held our first daughter together, he expressed a desire for another son. Even after our second daughter arrived two months ago, he still talks about wanting another boy.

I find myself trying to avoid him in the house because he can't keep his hands to himself. Regardless of my appearance or hygiene, he doesn't seem to care. While I appreciate the break from sex after the baby's birth, he finds other ways to annoy me, such as massaging my breasts and giving me body rubs that seem to bring him more pleasure than they do me. I have to physically push him away, but he thinks it's a game.

We weren't supposed to have babies back-to-back, but it happened, and while they are blessings, I wonder why he wants another child. He's 40, and we initially planned for a child-free marriage. If we're not careful, we might end up with more babies. I want to keep him away from me in bed, on the sofa, in the shower, and everywhere else. I'd hate to push him away, but will he eventually get tired of sex? Would it be wrong to take some form of contraception without telling him?


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